Friday, August 17, 2012

Tangkhul Surnames: Literal Meanings

In continuance with my collection, I now want to blab something about Tangkhul Surnames. You might want to check out about Funny Tangkhul names too, please do. This post is intended not as mockery but is puzzle cracking attempt to find meaning of surnames that are hard to interpret. I strongly believe that all surnames have their stories of origin and unique meanings and interpretation, which I will not be able to provide here. What I am trying to do here though, is an attempt to churn out the vocal meaning of the titles.

Asai: (A = He/She Sai = Rocks) Literally this means 'He Rocks.'
Awungshi: King's Blood
Chiphang: There Meet
Chahongnao: Tea Plenty Child
Chithung: There Temper
Duidang: Word Scarce
Falingwo: Dog Cultivation Grandpa
Gachui: High/Burning
Horam: Snow
Hongchui: Migrate Burn
Hungshi: Red
Hungyo: Red Nice
Jajo: Tea Request
Jagoi: Dance
Jamang: Tea Drink
Kamkara: Waist thread
Kapai: Easy/Wild Pear
Kaping: Strong
Kasar: Old
Kapudang: Kapu Scarce
Khamrang: Stop Black
Khangrah: Carry/Frying Pan Bring
Kashung: Gentleman
Keishing: Rear Cunning
Khashim: Sweet village
Khashimwoh: Village Sweet Grandpa
Konghar: Butterfly
Khongreiwo: Neighbor Big Grandpa
Kumrah: Year Come
Layam: Girl Run
Longvah: Flow Go
Lunghar: Stone
Luikham: Field Stop
Luiram: Field Village
Luithui: Field Go
Machinao: Salt Child
Mahung: Not Red
Makang: Not Burned
Masainao: Empty Child
Muinao: Itchy Child
Muivah: Itchy Go
Mungvah: Rule On
Mungshon: Rule Forever
Ngakang: Burned
Ngalung: Stone
Phazang: Good Included
Pheinao: Leg Child
Pheiray: Leg Big
Pheirim: Leg Ambush
Phungshok: Carry Out
Raman: Field Weed
Raihing: War Shine
Rainam: War Impose
Raingam: war Rich
Raiping: War Strong
Raleng: Come Dare
Ramsan: Village Counsel
Ronra: Round Water
Ruivah: Now Go
Rimai: Front Face
Risom: First Settle
Rungsung: Thrust On
Rephung: First Carry

Sangkhro: Long Let
Sareo: Meat Pluck
Sayai: Meat Throw
Seipainao: Cow dung child
Sharon: Hear Gather
Shaizak: Eat Exact
Shatsang: Cut Put
Shishak: Unhappy Meal
Shimray: House Big
Shimrah: House Come
Shimzing: House Below
Shinglai: Cunning Shallow
Shingnaisui: Cunning Near Rumor
Shaiza: Eat and Eat
Shokwungnao: Out King Child
Solo: Praise
Tangvah: Locality Go
Tallanao: Trumpet Child
Tuikhar: Word Sprout
Themsah: Brilliant Make
Varah: Will Go
Varam: Go Village
Vashi: Go Blood
Vashum: Go On
Woleng: Grandpa Dare
Wungkhai: King's Knife
Wungzek: King Discuss
Yangya: Look OK
Zimik: Sun
Zingkhai: Heaven Knife
These are some of the common surnames of the Tangkhul Naga and their literal meanings. Borrow some pure sense and mind of humor to laugh or cry after reading this crap. No offense intended, my surname is one of the funniest in the list. Laugh away time! What's in a name?

The Discovery of Tobacco (All For Humor)

The history of tobacco says the plant is native to North and South America, but doesn't say anything about the person who discovered it and smoked it first. This unjust history is disappointing as it fails to give due credit to a great discoverer. He deserves a mention in history as much as Christopher Columbus who discovered America, smoked tobacco, brought back tobacco to Europe and popularized it. Here is the story of the person who discovered tobacco.

Long long time ago, many many sun and moons away from today, in a cave on earth lived a group of human beings. They don't have proper names as they were yet to invent something called language. The members communicate using signs and weird sounds. The group eat meat of wild animals hunted by the male members in the group, and roots and leaves gathered by the women folk from outside the cave.

After living for five years in the cave someone in the group accidentally invented fire by striking two stones. This was when everyone in the group were inspired to make more discoveries. There was sort of a mad competition among the male members to compete inventing new things. Many inventions were made within a matter of few months. Thus the group started using new tools and the cave was transformed from just being a rusty hole to a very advanced dwelling place.

Among the male members there was one cunning and lazy fellow who was never keen on competing with others. He seldom go out for hunting and spent most of his days sleeping and eating. He has all the excuses for not contributing in the welfare of the group. One day as he was strolling lazily outside the cave he saw some strange leaves covered with sticky starch. He smelled the pungent leaf, pluck it and crushed it to ascertain the taste. The taste of the leaf numbed his tongue. He plucked few leaves to play some dirty pranks on others. He went back to the cave and gave to some in the group and asked them to taste it telling them it taste heavenly. He even told them the juice can be applied to cuts and injuries.

No one liked the taste and even the smell. One man in the group who had a cut on his leg applied the juice on his cut and howled like a wolf due to the excruciating pain. However, miraculously the wound slowly got healed. This was when the people in the group started believing the plant has medicinal value. The credit for the discovery without doubt went to the lazy fellow, which made him to ponder on finding more about the leaves' utility.

So, one day, he went and plucked some leaves and dried them in the sun and on the fire. When the leaves were dried, he was not sure what to use the leaves for. He took one of the dried leaves and rolled it while he kept on thinking. He lit up the tip of the rolled leaf and watch it burn slowly and saw smoke coming out of the other end. Out of sheer curiosity, he took a puff of the smoke and his mouth became numb for a while. He took a second puff and with that puff he felt some lightness in his head. He was feeling happy, others who were watching him throughout thought a strange thing would happen to the man. Nothing happened, but from then on he was seen rolling up the dried leaf and puffing on it frequently.

Others in the group soon started smoking the dried leaves and the leave came to be called tobacco. This is the story of how tobacco was invented. Ekk, is the name of the person which means 'the lazy sleep monger.'

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

The Best Tailor in India

If you love irony and sarcasm, you've landed at the right place. Read on!

Once upon a time, I went to a tailor and gave him my trousers for doing minor alteration. Being a short guy, I always have to cut the length of whatever new pants I buy to fit myself in. Most tailors do it within 10 minutes for which I hesitantly make myself poorer by 20 to 30 rupees. This protagonist tailor took more than 10 hours. A perfect example of magical time management and terrible promise keeping.

So, once upon a time I gave my trousers to this tailor in the morning which he told me to collect in the evening. Feeling a little elated at the thought that I would be getting pants that fits me, I went back to the shop to collect it in the evening. Bhaamm!!!! it was not altered yet which makes me realize tailors are not clocked like software engineers. I mean commitments are not so crucial to tailors as they are to engineers.

He offered me heavenly choices either to come back in the morning or wait for some time. I made the wrong pick of waiting; doubting it won't be done even in the morning and more because I am lazy by nature to budge in the morning. As I wait on, this tailor continued sewing other clothes without attending to what I was waiting for. After some uneasy waiting, I politely requested him to finish my work first. 'Yes, Yes' he did told me in Hindi and continued doing what he was doing.

When my patience was drained, I demanded he give me back the trousers so that I can go home and hand stitch myself. He sweetly asked me to wait for some more (more) time. Then, power went off throwing everything into darkness. I wait on in pitch darkness (I now assume he didn't even have candles) listening to the buzzing and sucking sound of the mosquitoes while the tailor went out to empty his bladder as if it was a God send interval for him to relief by the roadside that has suddenly become dark.

Power came back after some time which, to me did seemed like eternity. This was when the old tailor gave me a glance and pulled out my trousers from the pile of orders and started doing what he should have done long long time ago. Maybe, he saw the high probability of my temper floodgate bursting open when he looked at me. I consoled myself and was finally feeling victorious when he started measuring and cutting them to the right length.

Life sucks, well, sometimes: a man walked in with a pile of cloths before the tailor finishes what he was doing. And to my disgusting horror, the old fellow started taking measurement of the newcomer without completing what he should have completed long long time ago. Walking away with the pants at that point was not an option as they were by then scissored. The only options were to wait or to wait.

After the measurements were taken, another customer walked in who wants his jeans altered. The old man told the new customer it would be done by morning. All my conversation with the tailor till then was in my favorite corrupted Hindi because I've presumed that he won't know English. Intending to take a little revenge, I told the new customer in English, to go elsewhere as this fellow won't get it done even in the evening of the following day.

The old man glanced at me and said, 'it will be done by morning' in English. To which I replied 'you haven't completed mine which you promised will be done by evening.' There he elected silence as his best weapon and asked me where I am from to change the subject. Not wanting to go into the usual, 'where is Manipur, Is it near Nepal, Is it in China, etc. questions, I told him I am from Sihai Khullen (my village name). It did cut short the conversation and that was when he completed the alteration which didn't take him even 10 minutes.

I hopped out of the shop after making the necessary payment wondering why the tailor made me wait for so long. Maybe the best tailors in the world do that to prove their importance. With the power and authority vested on me, I hereby pronounce this tailor as best tailor in India.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Who Do I Look Like


My heart used to breath fire whenever someone called me 'chinky' 'Nepali' 'China wala' Japanese, etc. Lately, I've learned the art of swallowing without having to chew those wrong comments. Back home, some of my friends still call me 'blackie' because I was and I still become black when exposed to too much of kitchen smoke. People from my place would roar with laughter if they know that I am called 'China-wala' or 'Japanese' in this part of India.


Recently, a young boy in a supermarket elbowed his grandfather on the knee and whispered "dadaji dekho, China-wala," sheepishly pointing his finger at me. If he were a bit older I would have made a face that will urge him to concentrate more on his geography lessons. But, that was a young child who probably not have started learning geography. Then, what does he know about China? Well, as for the boy I just gave him a schweet smile and walked on letting his childhood innocence to decide whatever it wants to call me.

The real shocker however is when even educated grown ups mistake me for some foreigners. Geography lessons that I learned in high school blurted a lot about India being multi-ethnic and multi-cultural. I learned about the various groups of people living in India. I was made to believe India is called a sub-continent because of the unique geographical regions it has and the various types of people to whom it serve as home. Are students in mainland India taught a different kind of geography? If not, why am I mistaken for a foreigner in a country I dearly consider as my own?

OK, I won't deny that people from the Northeast look different. For the difference in physical features, people from the region most often are subjected to unwanted racial labeling and discrimination. The most recent being the crack down by Delhi Police on Northeast people in the name of thwarting Tibetans protesting the visit of Chinese Premier Hu Jintao. Yes, Tibetans and Northeast people may have similar features, but was it the right approach to curb a democratic protest by detaining and harassing the wrong people? Many Northeast people working in NCR region were reportedly harassed and some even detained. To add more salt to the wound, people from the region were even asked to produce their passports as identity proof in their own country. And yeah...why were Tibetans not allowed to protest the visit of Hu Jintao, when it openly acknowledges that Tibet is being illegally occupied by China? Strange are the ways of politics!


Violence against the people of Northeast region again is no myth. Someone or the other get beaten up once in a while as if it is a special treat for being a North easterner. These unwanted things happen mainly in the National Capital Region where we are supposed to feel most secure. Molestation and rape of northeast girls is not a made up story either. Where can we buy the feeling of belonging if we are being forcefully made to feel we are different?


I still remember police in the NCR region coming up with a list of dos and don't for Northeast people so there is no trouble for them. The silliest among them are not to venture out when it is late, not to wear objectionable dresses and most of all not to cook smelly food that may irritate the neighbors. How funny are these protocols? Special chinky rules right? Whose country really is India? Are people from the Northeast political refugees? These are some politically incorrect questions we are forced to ask ourselves to which we have no ready answers. Sorry, for being so straight, but, seriously there is no room for politeness in such painful situations.

Fortunately for me, South India have treated me well, except for the occasional mis-identifications. Well, that still amounts to rejecting me as an Indian right? This ranting about the injustice and the complaining and murmuring within can go on. This also mean the insult will not stop here. It is not easy to change people's mentality so easily and we are talking about a nation. Are the various insurgent groups in the Northeast region fighting for secession from India doing the right thing considering we are treated as sub-standard citizens? Maybe or maybe not. That is so political and I don't have politics in my gene sorry, no comments!

I would be happy if people just identify me as a Naga if they don't want me to be their fellow Indian. Oh, what a wild dream! If people don't know the Northeast state names, how on earth will they know the various tribes that inhabit the isolated seven Northeast states? I just belong to one of the many tribes.

I am not a Nepali, a Japanese, or a Chinese to the best of my knowledge, and I am not an Indian according to you. Then, who do I really look like?

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Do Patriotic Songs Always Lie

Ili pharasang kahai avaram Nagalim (Nagalim my motherland and my birthplace)
Masina riri phanda won-nganam leishimei (The breeze is filled with the sweet scent of flowers)
Leishiri kaphung kapha longkazat kongrei kongra (The green hills and the perennial streams and rivers)
Phungrai makhavat leithao ngalei katum ramna (Brings surplus silt deposit making it a fertile land)

Varena somi kahai avaramna (Land blessed by God)
Zada makan oh tharazat (Food is in surplus)
Kasik kasa ayet ung (The climate is very soothing)
Nimshimri leishiri (It's lovely and heavenly)
Proholi sochikatsa oh leishi avaram/Nagalim (Lets praise the Lord, Oh I love my motherland)

Zingkumvana Rakhongnga kazing kakum hangmi (Seasonal birds come to announce the arrival of seasons)
Wonbingna leishiri won zur kan tam rachithei (Varieties of flowers bloom to indicate different seasons)
Khamasosom kaphungli somda khalei ramli (Villages perched on hill tops)
Oh chibungvar khavar thai (Oh, they are like mushroom shoots)
Oh, leishi Nagalim. (I love Nagalim)


Kongrei kongra matekchim yakhari ngashanda (Green surrounding adorned by the rivers and springs)
Masi kadhar khanimma ram okmi kaphung kachi (The breeze is ever fresh and is everywhere)
Mashiwui marakapei chingri kahai ngalei (**** It is a peaceful land)
Ithum ngashanna akha shitkasangna akha (We follow one tradition and follow another faith)

Aman kasak thing ngalung Khavak maleilakma (There is no shortage of natural resources)
Ngaleilung li kashok sina lupa thaola mavat (Gold, precious stones and oil are aplenty)
Thingna rahawui ari ayur peida samphang (Natural herbs are in surplus)
Sayur vayurla mavat (Wildlife is rich)
Oh leishi Nagalim (Oh I love Nagalim)

This lyrics reminds me of Rupert Brooke's poem 'The Soldier' where he sort of gave England a Heaven status

Still reading? Well, here is my disclaimer. 'Whatever is written henceforth is purely my personal view on the reality distortion feat of the lyrics.

Yes, I vouch about the beauty of the place where I was born and brought up and need no exhortation from anyone to make me love it. I love my birthplace! That is my strength and weakness. However, I would not want to add imaginary merits to let others realize it is a great place.

The colored lines in the lyrics are those that I think should've been more realistic. If we sing about 'Green hills and perennial rivers and streams' we are clinging hopelessly to the past. Thanks to population explosion and mass deforestation, rivers are drying up and forest coverage is depleting quicker than ever as we listen to this song.

'Food is surplus.' What??? Yes, in the past, but no more. The food that we grow doesn't last even for six months. That is the reason why we end up eating rice imported from Andhra Pradesh, Punjab and Uttar Pradesh rest of the year.

'The climate is soothing.' Ah, yes it used to be but no more.

'****It is a peaceful land.' Real peace or imagined peace? The place never was peaceful and is not. The word 'peace' have played hide and seek with the Nagas for decades. Guns and peace are antonyms, not synonyms.

'Gold, precious stones and oil are aplenty.' Hello, we don't have goldmines, oilfields and other natural resources. If we do have rich deposit of oil we would have been a free country long time back. Rich and powerful countries would have pressed India to liberate the Nagas.

'Wildlife is rich.' Wild animals and birds are scared of us. We've devoured almost everything. Some that are sighted from time to time are those stupid animals from the jungles of Myanmar and migratory birds from Southeast Asian countries, which we hunt down anyways.

Enough of ranting!!! I love the tune of the song and have been listening to it though the lyrics make me a little impatient and restless. Maybe, patriotic songs are written mainly to celebrate the past and things that are utopian. Patriotic songs in other languages without doubt are not free from distorting reality.

Do patriotic songs always lie?

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Keyboard Shortcuts for Windows

Can you imagine a computer without the mouse? Maybe not for some years at least. This makes my love hate relationship with the mouse to last longer for now. This post is for mouse haters like me who long to live a mouse-less life but use it anyway for kingdom sake. Here are some basic keyboard shortcuts for windows users that would reduce some mouse addiction. Why was it named 'mouse' in the first place? Anyways!!! Here we are with some shortcuts I used frequently as if I invented them.

Operating System-Level Shortcuts
Alt + Tab (Toggle between programs)
Windows button + D (Show desktop, i.e., minimize all windows)
Windows button + M (Show desktop, i.e., minimize all windows)
Windows button + Tab (Show or toggle between active windows in task bar)
Print Screen (Screen capture for image conversion)
Windows Button (Open applications menu)

Browser Shortcuts
Ctrl + T (Open a new tab)
Ctrl + Shift + T (Reopens the tab you last closed; works multiple times)
F5 (Reload page)
Ctrl + R (Reload Page)
Backspace (Go to previous page)
Ctrl + Tab (Toggle between opened tabs)
Ctrl + Shift + Tab (Toggle backward between opened tabs)
Home (Go to top page)
End  (Go to the end of page)

Common Application Navigate, Find, Select, etc.
Ctrl + F (Search and find in document or webpage)
Ctrl + Shift + down arrow (Select until end of line)
Ctrl + Shift + Up Arrow (Select until beginning of line)
Ctrl + End (Go to the last page)
Ctrl + Home (Go to the top page)
Ctrl + B (Bold face/Unblod)
Ctrl + E (Centralize text)
Ctrl + L (Left align text)
Ctrl + R (Right align text)
Ctrl + I (Italicize/un-italicize
Ctrl + Print (Print command)
Ctrl + O (Save a copy as)
Ctrl + K (Place hyperlink)
Ctrl+ Z (Undo last operation)
Ctrl + Y (Redo last operation)
Crtl + O (Open file)
Crtl + S (Save)
Ctrl + W (Close active window, file or quit application)

Copy-and-Paste

Ctrl + A (Select all)
Ctrl + X (Cut to clipboard)
Ctrl + C (Copy)
Ctrl + V (Paste)
Alt + E + S (Paste Special)

Friday, January 6, 2012

Gmail New Look Sucks

What will Google earn if I start using the new looks in Gmail. This is the second time Google intentionally forced me to try the new looks in Gmail. How??? After loging in bhammm.... came a pop up message urging me to try the new looks. From there the only option to go to my inbox was to accept the offer or F*** off temporarily or permanently from Gmail.
Yes, there is an option to postpone switching to the new look, which for strange reasons known only to Google doesn't work. I had to reluctantly click on the Continue to the New Look button to continue and was welcomed by a messed up inbox. To keep it less offensive, the new look sucks!


The new look templates could be intended as New Year gifts for gmail users. I tried few of the templates, liked none and had to switch back to the good simple old template.

To switch back to the old look, I clicked on Setting and choose the option Switch Back to Old Look. There Google again gave me two buttons Swicth Back to Old Temporarily and Cancel. 'Temporarily?' I got the feeling that Google is going to permanently force us all to use the new templates when it thinks the time is ripe.

If you've not got such a mail and desperately want to try the new looks, click on Setting, select Mail Settings and click on the one liner message Gmail's getting a new look soon, select Learn More. There you are.
Let me know if you find something enchanting in some of the new looks that I missed.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Deactivating Airtel Value Added Services

If Airtel were a thief, I would say "You've become so fat after stealing my money."


Alas!!! can't do anything of that sort with a company that love minting only money.

It's crappishly frustrating when you are charged for services that you don't ask for. Airtel value added services (jokes, cricket, caller tune, job tips, miss call alerts, etc.) are things that I never have subscribed for, nevertheless Airtel activated some of these on my mobile for more than once. No matter how much I plead I've never got refund for whatever Airtel charged me for the services I didn't subscribe.

Lately, Airtel seems to have blocked pre-paid subscribers from reaching customer care executives. Anyways, they have better things to do than listen to complaints from pre-paid subscribers about unknown charges. Calling Airtel 121 (customer support) from a prepaid SIM just takes you to endless recorded IVRs (interactive voice response) to make your choices. We are not yet in that era where IVRs can fix problems that need human attention.

Well, if Airtel has activated something that you didn't ask for the best option is to deactivate the service yourself without calling 121 at all. There are two options.
  1. Send SMS "STOP" to 121
  2. You'll get an acknowledgement message and the list of services and their codes currently active on your phone
  3. SMS the service code such eg."3" "4" that you want to deactivate
  4. Airtel sends back an SMS for you to confirm your request
  5. Send confirmation SMS as "1"
Note: Here Airtel is trying to earn few more coins from you. :)
The second option is
  1. Dial *121*6#
  2. You'll get an SMS with the list of services and their corresponding codes active on your phone
  3. SMS back the service code to deactivate
  4. Send confirmation SMS when asked.
To activate any value added service from Airtel just *121*5# and follow the instructions.
P.S: This post is a signature of my frustration.